Riding the waves of grief

This week we were going to go deeper into self-care and how to build that rhythm into our days and weeks, but it’s taking a bit of a different turn.  I’m going to focus on grief and loss and hope and the importance of knowing what matters most to you - and living it out.

I often hear grief described as a roller coaster.

And while that makes sense to me (the ups and downs, the “hold on tight” and all), from my first deep grieving experience when I lost my mom in 2018,

I see grief more as riding the waves.  

I had been fortunate enough that at 42 I hadn’t lost anyone super close to me before.  Mom’s death was sudden and unexpected. Despite working up close with death as a hospice nurse for 12 years at the time, I hadn’t been on the other side of death and grieving.

One of the things that stood out to me the most were the waves of grief that would come out of nowhere.

I could be driving down the road or doing something...

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No time or energy for self-care

How do you fit in self-care even when you feel like you don't have the time or energy?

So many of us are burning the candle at both ends and have so much going on that there just doesn't feel like enough hours in the day. There is a lot of work that can be done to dig into what matters the most and free up some time. But for this week we are just going to concentrate on how to fit in little bits of self-care into the tiny pockets of time that you likely do have available even if you don't realize it right now. 

Think about your mornings. 

  • First of all, what do they look like? 
  • What about when you wake up? 
  • Are you alone? 
  • Are there others that are already awake? 
  • Or maybe you have a couple of minutes before you have to start waking everybody else up

Getting up even 10 minutes earlier can allow you a few minutes of alone time to set the day off on the right foot. 

Maybe it's… 

  • sitting outside and drinking a cup of coffee or 
  • ...
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What do you really love doing?

The BECOMING Method™ series week 7 of 8. This week we’re going to move on to the N in the BECOMING Method Needs - what is missing from your life - body, mind, and spirit

Looking at the activities that make up your day-to-day life can lead to finding ways to increase the things you love and decrease the things you loathe.

By this time, you:

- know where you’re starting from

- have determined your areas of improvement/opportunity

- know what energizes and drains you

- what makes you feel amazing

- know what makes you unique

- what matters most to you

- what you still want to see, do, and experience

 

If you’re just joining me, you can check out the previous weeks here:

Podcast version - the BECOMING Method series starts with episode 8

Blog version - click the link for the BECOMING Method series

Let’s get started with this week’s topic - Needs - what is missing from your life - body, mind, and spirit...

One of the ways that you can explore what...

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Making your dreams come true

The BECOMING Method™ series week 6 of 8. This week we’re going to move on to the I in the BECOMING Method -  Intention - fearless pursuit of your dreams.

Focusing on what we really want helps us avoid wasting time on the things that don’t matter very much. 

By this time, you:

- know where you’re starting from

- have determined your areas of improvement/opportunity

- know what energizes and drains you

- what makes you feel amazing

- know what makes you unique

- know what matters most to you

 

If you’re just joining me, you can check out the previous weeks here:

Podcast version - the BECOMING Method series starts with episode 8

Blog version - click the link for the BECOMING Method series

And you can download the Life Balance Tool here.

 

Let's jump in!

We only get one life and we want to make it count. As we get older and make more time for the things that matter most to us, we also want to be clear on the things we don't enjoy and...

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What really matters

The BECOMING Method™ series week 5 of 8.

This week we’re going to move on to the M in the BECOMING Method - Meaning - what would make your life feel significant?

Knowing what matters most to you makes it easier to say no to other things. In addition, clarity on your priorities allows for setting meaningful goals.

By this time, you:

- know where you’re starting from

- have determined your areas of improvement/opportunity

- know what energizes and drains you

- what makes you feel amazing

- know what makes you unique

 

If you’re just joining me, you can check out the previous weeks here:

Podcast version - the BECOMING Method series starts with episode 8

Blog version - click the link for the BECOMING Method series

And you can download the Life Balance Tool here.



Let’s get started!

If you’ve been working through this with me, it would be a great time to pull out the values exercise from week one now.  If you don’t have it or are just...

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Only YOU - what makes you so special

The BECOMING Method™ series week 3 of 8.

Life is hectic - and we can be so busy taking care of everyone else's needs that we lose sight of who we are.

Check out these simple yet effective tips for getting in touch with what makes you so amazing - fast!

By this time, you:

- know where you’re starting from

- have determined your areas of improvement/opportunity

- know what energizes and drains you

- know how to feel more confident

If you’re just joining me, you can check out the first 3 weeks here:

Podcast version - start the BECOMING Method series with episode 8

Blog version - just search the BECOMING Method category

And you can download the Life Balance Tool here.

 

 Ok, let's dive in...

When you think about who you are, you likely think about your name and the roles you play - your occupation, your family roles, the things you do

But you’re more than that.  

You are a unique individual with genetic makeup and gifts and talents...

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Boost your confidence quickly

 The BECOMING Method™ series week 3 of 8.

This week we’re going to move on to the C in the BECOMING Method - Confidence - what makes you feel amazing?

What can you do when you start doubting yourself or feeling down and need to turn it around quickly?

Check out these simple yet effective tips for boosting your confidence fast!

By this time, you:

- know where you’re starting from

- have determined your areas of improvement/opportunity

- know what energizes and drains you

If you’re just joining me, you can check out the first two weeks here:

Podcast version week 1  and week 2

Blog version week 1 and week 2

And you can download the Life Balance Tool here.

This week we’re going to focus on what makes you feel incredible, and how to make sure you can recapture that feeling.

It’s so easy to go through life on autopilot, going from one thing to the next without taking time to reflect on what we’ve accomplished or achieved.  

...
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What energizes you...and what drains you?

What makes you feel alive and excited? What sucks the life out of you?

The BECOMING Method series, post 2 of 8.

By this time, you:

- know where you’re starting from

- have determined your areas of improvement/opportunity

 

If you are just tuning in and didn’t join us last week, please go back and do so, or just grab the Life Balance Tool at www.jennylytle.com/balance. This will give you a way to take a look at your life in each of the major areas and determine where you’d like to make some positive changes.

 

This week we’re going to move on to the E in the BECOMING Method - Excitement!

What lights you up? Gives you energy?

What do you enjoy doing so much that you lose track of time? Take a few minutes to start coming up with some ideas. 

The thing is, as adults we often get so busy taking care of responsibilities that we can forget to do those things that recharge us.  And then we wonder why we feel so tired and stressed...

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The first step to lasting change - knowing where you are now

The BECOMING Method series week one - Baseline

Over the next 8 weeks, I’m going to walk you through my BECOMING Method™ 
  • a systematic approach based on the nursing process (assess, diagnose, plan, implement, evaluate), my coaching education, my personal journey, and my work with clients
  • designed to deliver the transformation you desire, as quickly and simply as possible
  • we work together to determine:
    • where you are
    • where you want to go
    • how you're going to get there 

For this first week, we're going to start off with Baseline. 

Where are you now? And what's most important to you?

We can't change what we don't acknowledge.

So let's take a look at how things are now: the good, the bad, and the ugly. No guilt or shame. Just an honest assessment.

It's easy to want to jump in and start thinking about all of the things that we want to be different, but lasting change and true transformation take some intentionality.

One of my mentors refers to...

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Ask and you shall receive

Why don't we ask for what we want?

I was able to learn an important lesson from a nine-year-old this weekend.

I've heard “if you don't ask the answer is always no” and I've even shared that with other people. But there are still those things that we're taught when we're young that stick with us, things like:

Don't be rude.

Don't invite yourself. 

Don't ask somebody for presents.

Don't bother them.

But I think I’ve changed my mind on this.

This weekend I was able to get together with some dear friends. One of them happens to be 9 years old and is the grandson of a friend. When I was leaving, I asked one of my adult friends if there was anything she wanted me to bring her on my way back to Indiana from Kentucky next time. And my young friend spoke up and said: “I want you to bring me a souvenir”. 

If I’m honest, my first thought was, “Well, I don't mind but you're not supposed to ask for things.”

But as soon as I had that...

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